What you can do:Well I know I have not been on as much as of late. I apologize for that. You see, I've been taking care of medical tasks and such. In fact I just got my blood results back from the specialist. Everything came back positive with the exception of my cortisol (stress) levels. They were extremely high, so I will be needing to go see a Endocrinologist (hormone specialist) soon. Funny, given that this would explain a lot.
Also I have a cardiologist (heart doctor) appointment tomorrow. I suffer from heart palpitations with no known cause. Sometimes I have these attacks where my heart starts pumping real fast. It hurts at times but it is not a heart attack or stroke. So don't worry about that.
But I'm not the only one in need of medical treatment. My cat Gypsy will be seeing the vet on Friday. She has a large lump near her throat that went undetected because it was a bit deep and so centered, that it didn't seem abnormal. But the lump has grown. We are hoping to be able to fix the problem. I personally don't care how much it costs, this is my first pet I ever had. She is 19 years old; which means surgery could be risky. But she is a strong cat!
Also we are bringing in my cat Tora for a basic check up and hopefully some blood work. She is a strange schizophrenic like cat. The way she acts, I really think something is mentally or medically wrong with her. So hopefully we'll sort this all out.
Other then that I am looking for a job. Probably the most difficult of all given that my parents are hounding me about it all the time. I don't get a break from that ever. (And they wonder why I have such high stress levels) I know I need a job. I get it. That's what adult life is all about, get a job and make money. *sigh* The problem I face is such a serious lack of motivation in anything and all I do. Even things I used to love like reading a good book, I lack motivation for that. Perhaps I suffer from depression. It seems all my friends seem to get that.
The ironic thing is the only thing that usually motivates me our my friends. But I rarely see them, they rarely come over. Truth is I miss them a lot more. Normally I hate talking about my problems but this is DArt, and its likely not as many of my real friends and definitely not my parents would see this. That's why I usually write stuff here. I do contact them now and again, however sometimes I wish they would contact me. Perhaps I'm lonely most of the time. No surprise, stuck in this house like a damn hermit.
I only get out of this place usually with my parents. We have a gym membership and while I like it, I don't like the nagging for me to go when they want to. It makes my motivation plummet. But talking about it doesn't seem to work, because all that happens is fights break out left and right. I'm just sitting here like....what the hell just happen. *sigh* Hopefully I can get a work out in without the battle.
I am eating a lot better though diet wise. The only thing I miss is dairy. The doctor has me off it for a month to check for intolerance levels. I think at this point it only happens once in a while with milk. Oh well. I miss stuff like cheese though, and frozen custard. 20 more days and then it will be over! However then she'll try to put me on a gluten free diet. I'm all like well...hell no....the dairy free and good diet is hard enough!
Sorry for the rant if you could call it that. I'll try to get to updating and doing things more often. I just have such a lack of motivation even with art right now. Its fascinating how many ideas I have going in my head, but can't seem to get them to paper.